Six Months Old

* This was supposed to post yesterday so please excuse the mix up!

Addison Grace, today you are six months old and I can barely believe it. I can't remember what life was like prior to you entering our world but yet it seems like only yesterday we were bringing you home from the hospital. You make us laugh daily and you never cease to amaze me with your newly learned abilities.

You are by far one of the happiest babies ever. There are only a few moments during the day when there isn't a smile on your face and those moments are normally followed by bedtime. No matter what time of day it is whenever you awake from sleep you are always smiling...ALWAYS! I walk quietly into the bedroom in case you aren't ready to be up and there you are rocking back and forth in your pac n play peering over the edge with a grin on your face because Mommy has come to rescue you. I call out "Baby" and you just wiggle and squirm and just can't hold still. I kiss your round cheeks and run my fingers through your hair to fix it and I take in your sweet baby scent. It's mind boggling just how much I love you little one.


Mommy has been such a bad blogger and I haven't posted any updates or pictures for your four or five month birthdays so I am going to give your updates and then I will post pictures later. *Our computer hasn't been moved to our new residence so bear with me.


The last you were weighed you were so close to being sixteen pounds. My guess is since that was about three weeks ago you have hit the sixteen pound mark. You have such a good appetite when you pay attention but feeding you solids is such a struggle because you are such a nosey little girl, you pay attention to everything else but Mommy and the spoon heading towards your mouth. You are twenty five inches long and we can already tell you will be a long little girl. You are in six to nine month clothing because the six month clothing just isn't long enough for you.


These past few weeks have been a major milestone for you as you have started crawling. You're not a professional yet since you do more rocking back and forth than anything but you have crawled, especially when you want something that is just out of reach.


We are still working on your ability to sit up all by yourself but you are so close I can taste it. I think I am more ready for you to be sitting than you are but you'll get there before long.


Bath time has become quite the adventure as you no longer hold still. You flop around from back to belly to back to side to crawling all because you must have the cup in your hands at all time. This cup is bigger than you (plastic milkshake cup from Steak N Shake) and you are constantly trying to hold it just right so you can attempt to drink out of it. You have already experienced that that is a bad idea once but you still keep on trying it.


Diaper changes and getting you dressed is also no longer an easy task. As soon as you spot something you start rolling over and trying to take off after it. My life would be a little easier if I could just let you crawl around without a diaper or clothing.


As I mentioned above you are eating solids, of course this is only when you can pay attention long enough. You eat all of the fruits and veggies and just this week we have started you on Gerber Yogurt Drinks which you seem to really enjoy. You are capable of holding your bottle all by yourself but more often than not I still hold the bottle for you because like I said you won't pay attention. You see something you want...the bottles drops to the floor and leaks everywhere. You see Mommy or Daddy or anybody for that matter and you just have to grin which means your mouth full of milk spills out everywhere. I was not kidding when I said you smile all of the time!


You would much rather play with a cup or your bag of diapers than you would an actual toy. I don't know why we even spend the money buying you toys when just the other night Daddy gave you an empty Pringles can and you just couldn't get enough of it. Of course maybe it was because you knew what had once been in that can and memories of sour cream and onion Pringles flashed through your mind since Mommy ate them all of the time while you were growing in my belly.


You love dogs, especially when they are quiet since you still aren't fond of loud noises. We aren't even allowed to sneeze or cough in the same room as you since as soon as we do the waterworks start spilling down on the cheeks and that bottom lip of yours comes out full force. Grandma has a miniature schnauzer who is thirteen years old, Sassy has quickly become the center of your world and you stop whatever you're doing just to watch her. If you're in your excersaucer and she walks by you you make the funniest face, like you have to go to the bathroom but can't, and you form your little hands into fists.


I am so glad that this is my last week of work for a quite awhile...fingers crossed. Leaving you each morning is becoming harder and harder and it took everything inside of me to leave you yesterday morning. No matter what time it is you always wake up right as I am heading out the door and yesterday was no exception. I hand you a bottle, change your diaper, and throw you into bed with Daddy. Monday morning though you were not interested in going back to sleep. You just laid there under the comforter surrounded by pillows and all I saw was this cute little face peaking up from the covers watching my every move. I stood in the doorway with the door cracked waving to you and you just smiled. And then when I shut the door to go ahead and leave you started crying...Lord how that hurt my heart. I wanted so badly to walk right back in there and snatch you up but rest assured little girl...we only have a few more days!


Your new favorite word and pretty much the only one you will say is "hey". We all say "hi" to you and if we're lucky we'll get a "hey" right back. We were laying in bed Sunday morning when Grandma came in and she said "hi" to you, you said "hey" right back, talk about cracking us up! We can also get you to say "num, num" when we're feeding you. I'll say "yummy, yummy" and then you follow up with your "num, num". You still can't laugh yet. It's more like a giggle here and there and mainly it sounds like you have asthma and are wheezing to catch your breath. It drives your Aunt Megan crazy! You also remind me of a squawking bird. You do these short little squeal/screams back to back and I am not kidding...it sounds like a squawking baby bird.


Overall you are just amazing. I tell you time and time again how much I love you but there are no words to describe my feelings for you. A few weeks ago a baby just a tad bit older than you was killed by the hands of his Father. I cried for this child and his memory and I cried for the lack of love and emotion that his parents felt for him. The mere thought of someone hurting you makes me ill and I can't imagine my life without you in it. I honestly don't know that I could go on living without you in my life...that is how much I love you. How someone could not love you or any other child to the point of obsession is beyond me. I am so blessed that you are my child and that God chose me as your Mother. Please know that your Daddy and I will protect you until the ends of the earth and that our love for you is so strong we would die for you. We will always be your number one fans and we will support you through all of your journeys. We love sitting back and watching you go yet are sad at the thought. You are getting so big so quickly that we can't help but miss what we are losing. Happy six months baby girl...six more and you will be a year old and celebrating with a new little brother or sister. February is about to become a very busy month for our little family!

Allow me to introduce you...

Since I have been better for awhile now and since you're probably really tired of seeing that I have been better for awhile I thought I would take a moment to introduce you to someone pretty special.

World...meet Blankenship baby #2

Baby #2...meet the world.

We can't wait to actually meet you in seven more months!

I'm all better!

Just thought you would like to know, I have fully recovered from my emotional breakdown earlier in the week. I have not felt that kind of despair in a long time. It should have been one of those stay at home in bed kind of days! I have moved on to my happy place now and I pray that it's here to stay...I sure don't want to have another melt down.

Since I haven't posted any pictures of my peanut lately here are a few for your viewing pleasure. Is she not the most adorable thing you have ever seen? My heart just melts whenever I look at her. Lord help me if this new baby is just as awesome as Addison...my heart will be beating out of my chest with all of the emotion I will have for them. Oh wait, how can this baby not be just as awesome...I will love them both the same no matter what their personalities are.

She has the most beautiful blue eyes ever! She's giving her Mommy a run for her money!

Daddy getting her to smile!

So big...And only because I can only imagine what she must be thinking...

You're having a bad day if that expression doesn't make you laugh out loud.

Pregnancy hormones take 1...

I don't know what is about today but at 12:42 p.m. I am seriously on the verge of a mini meltdown and we're only half way through the day. I know it's a combination of being pregnant, losing my job, not being with Addison, and realizing that we're moving but for crying out loud. I am sitting here blowing my nose and wiping away my tears with a freakin' Chipotle napkin that I had leftover from lunch today.

I am making myself sick wanting to be with Addison. We're so close to being together full time but yet we are so far away I am a complete emotional mess. Not to mention the raging morning sickness that I was suffering with this morning that I would much rather deal with in the comfort of my own home rather than at my place of employment in a public restroom. A week ago I was ok with not being at Addison's side day in a day out. I think it's because we didn't know any better and we knew me coming into work everyday was a way of life and that we just had to cope with it. But NOW...now that we know it isn't going to be our way of life it's heart wrenching to keep leaving her every morning. I wake up at 6:35 every morning, I change her diaper, feed her a bottle all while laying in our bed with her gently rubbing my face and talking sweet nothings into my ear. It takes every ounce of strength in my body to make myself get up and out of the bed to finish getting ready for work and not continue laying there with her in my arms. It pains me beyond words to call home nine hundred times a day and hear her in the background...to hear my husband say she is trying so hard to crawl but she just can't seem to master it...to hear her frustration in the background from the inability to move around like she wants so badly to do. My strength in coping is wavering as I lost count of how many times I contemplated sneaking out of here and wondering if my team lead would even notice.

I need my baby and I need her badly. I want to go home and tell her she will crawl in due time and I want to go home and praise her for every inch further she is able to move on her own. I want to go home and snack on her little toes and her chubby cheeks. I want to go home and wrestle with her during diaper changes and grin when I see the cute little baby butt that I now see every time we change a diaper because she wants to roll over instead. I want to go to the Doctor and get my nausea medication and I want to hear that this baby growing within me is a healthy viable baby just like they did last July when I was pregnant with Addison. I want to see this baby on the big screen and see it's little heart beat wildly in it's chest. I want to know if we're having a son or another gorgeous daughter. I want to feel this baby move all about in my tummy and I want it to be February already so that I can hold him or her in my arms. And then I realize I am not ready for it to be February yet because I don't want Addison to be a year old , I still want her to be my little baby who still needs me for everything. And I want someone to tell me everything is going to be ok, that everything happens for a reason, and that when one door closes another one opens, and that there is light at the end of the tunnel, etc, etc., etc. And dammit I want someone to tell me to man up and quit your crying. For someone to tell me to perk up and get off of this path of negativity for crying out loud, and that if I don't knock it off I will turn into my own little episode of the "Young and the Restless" where we will all be confused and miserable because we can't keep track of who is divorced from whom, and who remarried who, and whose dead and whose not and why one day they have a two year old kid and now the kid has morphed into a 22 year old adult overnight and that just wouldn't be good...not good at all.

And at 1:21 I feel a little bit better now that I have gotten that off of my chest and soaked every last napkin I had left with my waterworks. And one things for sure...boy am I glad that I have Monday off for the 4th...I need that extra day and in case you were wondering...that will leave me with 37 days of being away from my baby buttercup. Lord have mercy on everyone reading my blog between now and then!

Shocking news just keeps pooring in!

Well if it isn't one thing it's always another, especially in our house. Not only do I have a four month old daughter with another baby on the way but now I am out of work. After more years that I care to think about I was given my pink slip yesterday from the mortgage company that I work for. A part of me is sad, frustrated, and down right angry. But then there is the other part that is glad. Glad because my dream has come true. I get to be a stay at home Mom for awhile and with another little one on the way it couldn't come at a better time.

My last day of work is August 20th and I can't wait. I am going to be a part of the club that can do activities during the day with my children! We are going to be selling our house which is a bummer but we knew it was time even without losing my job. We're going to be moving in with my Mom and paying off all of our debts, selling Daniel's junk pile of a car (take my word for it, Chrysler 300's are not that special...I hate that car), and saving lots of money. In a few years we hope to have enough money saved up that we can buy an empty lot and start building our dream home. I also plan on going back to school once the new baby gets here.

I guess the saying is true, "When one door closes, another one opens!"

Can you tell I am pregnant again? Check out my misspelling up there in the title. Seriously, pooring...come on Katie! LOL

One word...SHOCKED!

I know I have mentioned it time and time again but for those of you just tuning in, it took Daniel and I several years to conceive Addison. We had actually come to the point where my health, which was horrible last year, took priority over having a child and we set parenthood on the back burner. We made the ultimate decision for me to get better and that once that occurred we would begin the long process of determining why we were having infertility issues. Imagine our surprise that days after we had come to that decision we wound up pregnant with Addison. It's amazing how life sometimes turns out.

We found out we were expecting Addison on June 13th 2009 and by June 15th I had already seen the Doctor. I was considered high risk due to my health and it even went as far as having surgeons on stand by in case I needed immediate surgery to remove my gall bladder. Never would I have guessed that my pregnancy would have been so uncomplicated and easy, I was prepared for a battle.

Now many of you are going to say I had lost my mind but honestly, the day we brought Addison home from the hospital I was ready to do it all over again with baby number two. My pregnancy was normal, my labor and delivery was normal...knock on wood, so I didn't have any horror stories or memories that would prevent me from being ready again. Daniel at that point was my only obstacle. He and his younger brother are 10 1/2 months apart and he was adamant that we would not be repeating that so we discussed when it would be right to start trying again. We tossed out a few numbers and had pretty much decided between six and twelve months. We knew we wanted the kids to be close together but spaced far enough that life would be half way civilized for us. Of course when you want to wait a few months before you start trying for another one you actually have to do something to prevent it from happening sooner. We did not do that and it's not my fault. Because of my Crohns disease I cannot take birth control. I found that out the hard way let me tell you! I did have the option of having shots or something implanted but after years of infertility taking something to prevent children is a very scary thought and it's one I shot down very quickly. Now this of course meant that somebody else was responsible for preventing a child and as most typical men are, he was not thrilled with the thought. Then you add in the detail of Daniel being just as obsessed with Addison as I am and you have a problem. If I told him once I told him a million times that if I got pregnant again so soon it was his fault and if he ever uttered the words that we was upset or that he wished we would have waited I would have killed him. That threat obviously didn't bother him and then finally when I asked him if he was OK with it he actually said to me that he was having so much fun with Addison that he didn't care if it happened so soon.

Well it happened and it happened very soon, sooner than I anticipated actually. Who would have thought that after years of trying for Addison that baby two would happen without really trying and three months after having Addison. I think that was a big part of our desire to go ahead and try again. The fear was still in the back of my mind that if we didn't take advantage of my "after pregnancy" fertility that we would risk it taking years again for another one and it scared me. We found out we were pregnant on June 16th 2010 and if my calculations or correct we are due on February 20th 2011. It's almost as if I am repeating last year day for day. I would just like to add, we will not be repeating this next year...just an FYI!

So far I haven't been as sick as I was with Addison and in all honesty...I still don't think it has officially sunk in that I am pregnant. I keep looking at the pregnancy test thinking that one of these times I will look and one of the pink lines will be missing and then won't I be the fool for announcing it to the world. We tried really, really hard to wait for the big announcement this time but yet again we just couldn't do it.

I am well aware of the fact that we are still in the beginning stages and we are not out of the clear yet so anything could happen but our being parents yet again is a big deal for us and one that we want to announce from the roof tops. I pray I won't have to make a sad announcement but I will if I have to and it will be a little easier than the announcement I read over the weekend. Baby Cohen, who I mentioned in an earlier post that was born with a broken heart, lost his fight late last week. Losing a child, even if it is still growing within you, is a terrible thing to experience. It is one that I hope I will never have to live through. I cannot fathom what this young couple is going through. Faced with their own infertility issues they managed to overcome it only to be told that their unborn child was sick and would need surgery immediately after birth. He died with them only having held him for a few short minutes right after his birth. In the few days he spent here on Earth he endured surgery after surgery. It makes me angry and sad that they couldn't experience what Daniel and I experienced and that Cohen couldn't be healthy and perfect like our Addison is.

Please keep this family in your thoughts and prayers that they may find the peace and the comfort that will allow them to continue on.

Love your children today as if it were your last. Hold them in your arms and take in their sweet scents. Count their fingers and their toes and apply soft kisses to their chubby little cheeks. Savor their cries and their temperamental outbursts and comfort them in your lap. Allow their sweet smiles and soft giggles to melt your heart. Enjoy being just as wet as they are after bath time and appreciate diaper changes, spit ups, and food thrown all over your kitchen floor. It's those moments that you take for granted and those moment that Cohen parents would give anything to experience.

Happy Father's Day

I am so blessed to have so many wonderful guys in my life. While there are so many negative aspects about being a child of divorce the plus is that you get the fortune of having so many more wonderful people in your life than you would have had your parents stayed married.

My Dad is one of my best friends, someone I can call about anything and we do typically speak to each other every other day or so. In the past I would talk to him at least once a day. He just loves being a Papaw to his two little babies. Although when I told him about the 3rd that is on it's way he told me that my sister and I were obviously trying to kill him...lol.

My Step-Dad has been in my life since I was around two years old. He and my Mom married when I was three years old so I don't remember a time when he wasn't involved. While he and my Mom are no longer together he still considers me his daughter. He sent me to private school growing up, bought me my first car, and sent me to college which I screwed up royally. He is supportive in almost every decision I have made, except for the not finishing college part, but can we really blame him?

Not only am I blessed to have two Dad's, I also have this pretty special guy in my life and he is my Father...my Godfather so that counts. If you want to talk supportive this guy is supportive one hundred percent. He loves me like his own and he welcomed me into his home, his family, and all of their events as if I was their own. I love you Uncle Dan! If love could make you better, you would be as healthy as a horse!


Last but not least there is this guy! Daniel has far exceeded my expectations of his being a father. I knew he would be a good Dad but seriously, I don't have to ask him to change dirty diapers, give Addison baths, or help with the nighttime feedings. He does it all without hesitation and he loves this little girl in a way that he will never love me. He is part of the reason why baby #2 is on it's way. Through all of my countless "I want another baby already" comments he supported me for one reason and these are his exact words, "why not I am having fun". Happy first Father's day Sweetie...you deserve it and I can't wait until this time next year!